i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
