dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Randomize
