Your tits are I can't wait for
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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