He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
