you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
