she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
