That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
