dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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