Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
