YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
She has the best kind of daddy issues
We are all done wearing pants today
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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