Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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