Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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