how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Just cropdusted the office
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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