i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
