her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
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