Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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