I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
