yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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