Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
