There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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