What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
You need a sexual gate keeper
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
