I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
So much Jack, so little girl.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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