its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
