It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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