I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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