ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
