how can u be prego again
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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