I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize
