brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Can I color on your dick again?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I have post one night stand depression
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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