Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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