doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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