dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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