I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
