can u get pink eye on your cock?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
What drink are we having for lunch?
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
