sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
