physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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