Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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