Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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