dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
