I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
