She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
