I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I wanna passion pit in your ass
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
