just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
