they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
