I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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