I will die if light touches me.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
