I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
