Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He better not be in your backpack
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize