i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
