fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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